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Kistaro Windrider, Reptillian Situation Assessor

Unfortunately, I Really Am That Nerdy

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And silently gets harder to ignore
airbrushed, thoughtful
I usually hear music. My mind is as reliable a player as my Creative Zen Vision; I know the difference between music playing only in my head and music processed by my ears, but there isn't a strong subjective distinction.

While waiting in line for lunch (sesame chicken and fried rice), I considered the music playing in my head and decided to listen to the world- something, I realized with some surprise, I rarely do.

I stopped playback and I started overloading immediately.

I don't think it was even a full minute before I turned my head-music back on. I repeated the experiment, this time in the quiet Gargoyle area, used as a much quieter eating area than the rest of the Food Court; I didn't hit immediate uncomfortable sensory overload as from in line, but I was immediately aware of the 60-cycle hum of the flourescent lights in a bad (read as: remarkably annoying) way.

So I learned something. My mind constantly loops music to mute the overload I otherwise get from trying to process all the sounds around me. I guess it's one of those semi-autistic things again, but I find the resistance I built against it interesting: give myself something easy to process auditorially so I don't get uncomfortable processing everything.

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You can hear the buzz? I, of course, can't. That's probably a good thing considering what people who can hear it say about it.

Only when I don't have something else blocking my auditory processing. If I'm focusing on anything, including internal music, I don't process the hum of flourescent lighting or my external hard drive or my fridge or my computers or my laser printer or my air cleaner or the air conditioner outside, but if nothing's preoccupying my sound subsystems, I'm aware of all of it.

I also have hearing above the "normal" range, apparently, at least by the fact that my father's ultrasonic cleaner for his circuit boards is well within my range of hearing- very painfully so, given that it has to run at 160 decibels. Fortunately, when I'm home, he warns me first now that he knows it's a problem for me, and I can get far enough away it doesn't bother me, since high-frequency sound waves carry poorly.

"Fortunately, when I'm home, he warns me first now that he knows it's a problem for me, and I can get far enough away it doesn't bother me, since high-frequency sound waves carry poorly."

I've read that's why mice talk to one another in a sound range above human hearing: since it doesn't carry as far as a lower-pitched sound, an owl up in a tree is less likely to eavesdrop and come in for a snack. Mice don't just have such shrill voices because they're small; it's to ensure their survival and privacy. They only use lower-pitched voices within a human range of hearing when they're in distress so that other mice farther away can hear that they're in trouble. They talk incessantly above that range, since they're very social. The exception is with newborn baby mice: they make a constant and very quiet muddle of squeaking that we can hear, though just barely. Sort of like human babies crying.

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I'm okay. My installation of Trillian is not; it's utterly refusing to actually render anything. Uninstall/reinstall is on my to-do list this weekend.

And yes, I've been missing you too. *hug* I do need to get on instant messengers more, especially now while my homework load is still manageable.

Huh. Interesting. I play music in my head a lot of the time, actually. Often the lyrics in some way correspond directly to my train of thought, and I only realize it when I stop to think about it for a sec. A lot of the songs at the ends of my posts come into my head that way as I'm having the train of thought I decided to post about.

My mom did think I might be slightly autistic in some way when I was little, 'cause of that seeming lack of interest/empathy thing I've mentioned in an earlier post. Wonder if those facts match up in some way.

Keep note: do not pause while near old electronics, including CRTs (especially IBM's) and winding devices (particulary VHS rewinders). There are a few others, but I wouldn't think of them for this reason.
- t's

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