May 29th, 2010

chromatic self

So, yeah, I guess I'm a Buddhist

I don't think the correct term is "conversion". "Re-identification" might be better. Frankly, "finally doing enough research" or "acceptance" might be more precise terms.

I think the only things changing about my religious views are what I call them, and the degree to which I am willing to take them to their conclusion.

If I agree that the physical world is a largely-illusory playground built by a convergence of energy, that your consciousness is much less limiting than you think it is, that the boundaries of identity are nowhere near as enduring as they seem (and in a recursive way, there is only one thing, which has nothing to exist in and therefore does not exist), and being physical is temporary once you figure that out, I might as well conclude that the physical plane has nothing to offer once someone is free of it, and of identity, and of restlessness; nothing of value is lost once all demand for it no longer exists.

That, I think, was the only thing making me uncomfortable with Buddhism. The concept of Nirvana, as featureless unbounded joyful tranquility free of identity, was disquieting. I think I've had two charges of mind:

  1. I can conceptualize the peaceful lack of restlessness as a worthy alternative to strife.
  2. I can conceptualize it as a comforting sort of endgame- and nothing that needs to be rushed into anyway.

So, I'm a Buddhist, my beliefs haven't really changed, and I'll simply have to explain that later.


(Automatically transcribed from handwritten notes. If something makes no grammatical sense, I probably missed it on my correction pass.)
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